Le Grand Depart, c'est maintenant!

Potentially, a very important day, for British cycling. I am typing this week's post, accompanied by the iconic voices of Paul Sherwen and Phil Liggett (legendary).
To me, sounds of them mean Cycling, Summer, Sun, Sport, Competition, Brilliance. Le Tour.

Focus, right. My experiences (since 2006), have taught me the advantages of taking quite a 'laissez faire' attitude.
Go Brad!!! Leading by half a second. Hmmm.
'Laissez faire'. I have been forced to accept that 'what'll be, will be'. Although much of my life has involved being educated to design the future. I have learnt that although a design can work well, 'shit happens'. There is no way that we can successfully create a 'design for life'.

Libraries gave us power, then work came and made us free.

Hmmm. Fabian 'Spartacus' Cancellara is unbelievably good. Never mind Bradley, you've got 3 weeks...

Anyway, yeah, er. I find that now in the situation i am, life can be good, as i put fewer pressures on myself. Having joined a 'french conversation' group, has helped along with my holiday in Paris. Although I am not fluent, I have the mental ability to understand and communicate (mostly). Combine this with singing along to my music in the flat (like a pro!), and improving my vocal strength through physio exercises, I now feel more confident in my vocal power, than pre-accident.

This unusual self-confidence does bring problems though. I admit that I am just a big flirt! If I think of something, I say it (within reason)! There should be no harm in paying people compliments, however, I fear that I am in danger of looking a desperate, lonely fool. Which maybe I am.

Ah well, in danger of getting a depressing read, coffee calls.

Been out to cafe (which was shutting), so carried on to the next one, read half chapter of 'Enduring Love' (quite amazing read). Now am running late for important things (such as pub). Will complete tomorrow asap. cya!

Fantasy Football is serious stuff...

Official statement by 'PG Tips' manager Patrick Goodacre:

"I have enjoyed 3 seasons at the helm of this mighty (fantasy)football club. I have led them from the base of the league, upwards, enjoying a spell at the top of the league, last winter.
I have been offered an undeniably attractive role at the city's rivals, 'Sporting Tips'. A smaller club, but ambition is still there.
I am signing a contract with this club, which will allow me greater versatility, in terms of the management with the club, but it does mean that unfortunately, i will be leaving PG Tips. I have already been out scouting for this new team. I will select a full squad by the end of the season's initial transfer window. My management involvement is then to be minimal throughout the season, with the 'simple' aim of finishing away from bottom. It is not a 'simple' aim, as i know that the team belongs to highly competitive leagues."

Final whistle? I type...

Ok, the first semi finalist has been chosen...
Hmmm...

... I can now type undistracted.
My Parisian experiences, forced me to realise how much further 'ahead' we are here, in England, in dealing with wheelchairs. I still feel surprised/shocked when i realise how much effort shopkeepers, bar staff, waiters/resses, put in, to make sure that i can shop/dine at their establishment. I then find that it seems general public opinion, that people should help most (therefore prioritizing wheelchairs). I am obviously all for this, but do remain utterly grateful for the effort that people put in. Fortunately, I do have the ability to begin a small repayment simply with a smile (amazingly effective), or a simple few words of gratitude. Politeness works!

As ever, I was in a cafe the other day, when a group of about six school boys and girls entered. They reminded me straight away of myself being a pre-GCSE teenager, and the dreamful 'innocence of youth'. Hehehe! Oh no, I am getting old!
But, it's true, that whilst you must be allowed to have those dreams, 'shit happens'. Although we would love to plan successfully everything, it is impossible. Everyone meets their fate at some point.

I believe that we cannot direct our fate, or willingly choose our path. It is only through our mood can we attempt to be directive. Essentially, we can affect our mood.

"Now! NOW! NOW! It's all about NOW!"
Words of personal hero, Jeff Buckley (Live in Chicago 1995). Obviously psychologically troubled, but an incredibly talented, clever artist.
As a teenager, although I worshipped every word he sang, I failed to understand quite what he was on about here. I feel that it is only recently i have partly learnt.
Seventeen years ago, maybe, but the concept of living 'in the present' is still very important. It is something that I have learned partly. Whilst it is important to plan and design for the future, essentially, we cannot plan everything. Shit happens! It is all about now!  Now NOW NOW!

Strategic typing...

Hello, I type tonight, as it is the first night of no Euro 2012 competition. No football to distract me. On the subject, I've been talking to my French friend who is happy of his national team requiring less rest now (pre-quarters), because the route allows for a longer rest pre final. Hmmm.

Sorry, i may have bored most people off, but it is IMPORTANT!

A positive note to follow this news, explains the number of things that i have learnt, whilst away in Paris. I was amazed by myself having a large level of self-confidence.
I noted that it was clearer to see other people's reaction to a wheelchair user. People first experience things through the eyes, see a wheelchair and think the worst. I enjoyed seemingly amazing people, by not only speaking sense, but in French! It is a sad state of affairs, but generally people are amazed by the sense i talk, if they make the effort of paying attention.
I've never been the most confident speaker, but now, when people (both abroad and here) have to give me the 'respect of the wheelchair', it is a lot easier.

Now, it's been a while, so more Music you get. A new, old, discovery.

 Force Of Nature - One of my favourite songs by Oasis

Sorry, I rant...

Back in the day, a trip abroad, would provide great anticipation, as to which music shops i would come across. I would often get great joy discovering a 'new' cd/album, by various bands. I realise that I 'am living in the past' doing this. Believe it or not, it saddened me slightly, when packing for my trip to Paris, that I would not 'gain anything' from finding a Parisian shop. FF> to the modern day Patrick. So I just went on i-tunes, where you can 'download' entire back catalogues, at the click of a mouse, on my laptop. I needed to go nowhere. Boring. Sad.

Sorry, Patrick needs to enter the modern day.

Two or three more Paris-related notes. I have noticed, and it should be noted by all the millions of girls out there, chasing me, that I seem to found all Parisian girls, drinking espresso(i), in cafes, extremely hot (attractive, as opposed to temperature!). It made me realise that I hardly ever see any English do this, never English females. Tssst. Either Britain and it people need to change, I need to move to France, or I continue without English girl.
Coffee/Espresso must remain.

As the saying goes "When in Rome..." applies to this story. I was full of joy, going along the Champs Elysees, wearing a broad smile in the sunshine, posing with my Lacoste carry bag. I wanted to top things off by posing (a wheelchair could be ignored, i hoped) in a cafe, drinking an Espresso. So I queued up, to drink staying at the bar. To my horror and utter disappointment, my little Espresso shot was served in A CARDBOARD CUP!!
disgraceful.
Who really has an Espresso 'to go'. Surely one is not in such a rush that they cannot neck it in the cafe, and then go?
in Paris?
On the Champs Elysees?
New York? Yes I can imagine that you get 5 free Big Macs 'to go', when you order a Espresso in polystyrene cup. Do they have Espresso?

I stop.
Breathe.

Perhaps the next note is seemed slightly ironic. Perhaps not. A few weeks ago, and very confidence-enhancing itself, I was asked how to gain self-confidence. It was nice to be recognised as self-confident. I know that prior to my accident, I was generally happy, satisfied and content. However, it is post-coma, that I have been forced to draw on my mental ability. I knew that i had finished 'student/education life'. Whilst in hospital, I had doubts of my ability to do anything, I knew that I knew what I knew. Confused? Sorry, it makes sense.
I have known constantly for the past 5/6 years that my brain may be injured, but I can still think straight.

Hmmm. I have gained self-confidence in my thought processes. Fitness, you either have it, can gain it, or not. Mental processes are the same. Personally, often I have been forced to compensate for physical disabilities, by drawing on available mental strengths. When these have been low, I have looked back through history (always have), found out how i overcame a certain big problem, then I get the belief that i can overcome this new problem with ease. If you need to do something, just do it. Afterwards you can assess your confidence gain. Fear is your only enemy. Wipe it clean away, by just doing what you think is best. Fate will give the result. We cannot dictate our own fate.

On a more light-hearted note, I recently went into a Cafe in Kingston, pretending that i was French. I had just been in France, where favourably a black-coffee is a black coffee (un cafe). It is here in England, that the 'Starbucks fashion monster' has stolen our 'coffee' , and turned it into an 'Americano'. Asking, for a simple 'cafe noir' in Kingston, they looked at me as if i were mad and told me it would be an 'Americano'.
No No No 'Starbucks life' has Americanised everything.
Everything. We now have to pay 'on the go'. What happened to paying at the end?
France has remained defiantly European, Britain has been lost to USA.

Sorry, I rant...    

Paris wallpapers

more Photoshop fun...

Free Parisian Wallpaper

As I get hours of fun playing on Photoshop with my photos, what better than to create some free wallpapers for you? Paris provides perfect scenery. Here are initial three.

Weekly notes.

Although my major highlight of this week/month/year so far, of my trip abroad has been described i previous posts, another week has passed and so i have notes that i wish to discuss.

First on my notepad, was made before i had finished packing for my trip.
'A trip abroad would usually have led me to investigate new cd shops that i could discover. The excitement, 'What could I buy?' 'Would I discover anything new?'. So exciting.
This time around I just went on Itunes and selected music on a list which i could scroll through on my laptop. Hmmm, boring. Essentially, possibly the same music attainable, but I had stayed, eyes glued to my laptop, Hmmm. What is an album? Is just a collection of songs, or is it a 3d presentation of the songs?

A note that i made a couple of weeks ago, when it was sunny 'summer'.
'You see so many more 'weekend cyclists' now it's sunny, out, posing. Whereas you can spt the 'real cyclists' out, slogging it, midweek.'
I could continue to rant on about these 'weekend cyclists'(fair-weather only), and i remember how it really did used to annoy me, but now i do not cycle so no comment. Just because i can't cycle does not mean all of these 'fake cyclists' are invisible to me.

Last week at work gave me a huge signpost to learn from. Not literally (I am a graphic designer, but hey)! I had a large, two-page document, that i had created on the computer. Speed-wise, I was moving steadily through, aiming to create the first page in the morning, and second, after lunch. Just before lunch, I showed a colleague who was pleased with what i had created. I closed the computer and went to lunch..... DAMN!!! Oh no, I hadn't saved it. After immediately trying to revive my creation (my mornings work), i failed to do so and went off to lunch in a huff. I spent the lunchtime trying desperately to draw all positives from the situation. I realised that i was not in the mood to start all over again, there were elements that i was sure to continue onto the second page, and so planned to restart the creation midway through, going back to the first page, after the second. I did so, successfully, and on time (and had saved the file a number of times in the afternoon). On the way home, I realised how proud i was to keep my head and not to have become too angry at lunchtime. I realised that I must have had a fair level of self-confidence to revive my design.

Self-confidence is invaluable. Having it allows you to keep your head steady, and therefore anything is possible. The easiest way of finding it, is to look back at your personal history and find similar or worse problems. We then must have overcome them, or tackled them somehow successfully (in some respect). We know how to tackle that problem, or we managed that difficulty, so therefore we can be confident that we'll get through these problems lying ahead.

Death is death. For everything else, positives (confidence, ability, strength) can be found from everything. Everything can be considered both positively and negatively. If there is a negative aspect, there is always a positive to be found.  

Parisian thoughts...

Although I have plenty more 'weekly notes' to bring you soon, I will complete my Paris chapter with notes that i compiled whilst in this most beautiful city.

Only 3 nights was spent here, but I was quickly assured that whilst verbal languages may be very different across the globe, a smile remains universally the most simple and positive gesture anybody can communicate.

I announce with pride that, although i was in Paris and the French can be very proud of their food, the weather and accessibility issues forced me (us - my PA and i)into a japanese restaurant. I tackled the problem of eating my meal with chopsticks, easily. Compared to our standard cutlery, it requires users to only use one hand (I am used to this, post-injury).

I then noted that 'traffic lights do not count in Paris'. I think that this remains a fair statement but i did sit, amazed by the eight lanes of traffic circumnavigating the Arc De Triomphe.

I felt for the first time, that here in Paris, I was in a wheelchair and therefore an 'outsider'. Pffft! I know that I am very lucky to live where i do, but the accessibility of anything in Paris is a no no. Only very modern buildings such as the Pompidou Centre, and the Eurostar part of Le Gard du Nord, are designed with accessibility in mind.

That said, I did come across a chocolate shop on the morning i was leaving. I duly flirted with the staff member, who sold me some mighty fine chocolate, who also showed me the ramp that was installed as part of the step at the front door.
Simple, yet the first i have seen anywhere. Paris? Amazing!

I am not a racist, but it did amaze me the sheer numbers of an ethnic group that you would see in one place (say, taking photos on the Bateaux Mouche), compared to another ethnic group being spotted owning Champs Elysees shopping. I stop as i don't mean to cause harm, but i did find it amazing. Hmmm.

more photos...

Ok ok, i didn't catch you...

I was proud of my wheelchair surviving, carrying me to the top of Montmartre and the Sacre Couer.

Le Centre Pompidou

Notre Dame

The Glass pyramid of Le Louvre

I really didn't predict being able to see Blackpool, from the Seine, but...

     

HOLIDAAAAAY!!!!

As you may have guessed from my previous post, I have been away, on holiday in Paris. I booked the holiday earlier in the year before I had a clear understanding of Britain's 'national party time', oh well, I knew where i would rather be. It was my first trip abroad since my unique and very special French cyclosportif (October 2006, a couple of weeks before my major injury).
Special.

Centre Georges Pompidou

Rue de Rivoli

Arc de Triomphe

Notre Dame (et moi)

Above and below: Views from a Bateau Mouche boat trip on the Seine.

S'il vous plait

Bonjour!! Pardon, si tu pense mon 'blog' s'arrete. Il n'arrete pas. Un moment s'il vous plait. A bientot :)