Sitting on the verge...

... Of a new year. Sorry, just a quick post. A time to make a year-long resolution. I have to state that I strive for two things. This coming year I will search for a job/ work of some sort, and I will try and try to make one giant leap forward in terms of my physiotherapy rehab (not literally). I do have a belief/idea of a realistic aim, but I shall keep it personal, refraining from announcing it to the world. Gotta go.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

v3, a 1,2,3,4......

Hellooo!
'Twas cold today, but nothing a warm mug of coffee can't fix. 'I sit and wonder' was chosen as the title of this mighty blog, as it is a song title opening the Verve's latest album, 'Forth'. It is quiite appropriate for the situation in which I find myself. Those of you who are 'friends' on Facebook will recognise my passion for good music. I admit that the 'good' used here is a subjective word, with different people warming to different music. I feel that personally, when answering the  question posed by my brother on his blog (http://domthewriter.blogspot.com/), 'football or music?', my answer has to be music.
I have been told that when I lied in a hospital bed, minimally conscious (i think, if at all), post accident, friends and family would surround me with familiar music (always good, obviously). I am grateful for this as it seems that I have maintained my taste.
I used to play the guitar, using this as  a great form of relaxation. If I was ever stressed out (for whatever reason), by the last chord of 'Paranoid Android' (Radiohead, track 02, OK computer) played simultaneously on CD and guitar, all was made to be better. Not only this song, hundreds more were able to help, but this was always the best remedy.
Unfortunately, now, due to my disability, I cannot play the guitar. Mentally, I think that I remember how to play many tunes ('lucky man' by the verve, is a very easy 3 chord shape of G,D,A), although my memory may be a little rusty!
My lack of musical ability, knowledge of 'the scene', attendance of gigs etc, may be applied to my accident, but I also realise with shock and horror, that I am no longer a 22 year old (as I was upon accident). I know that I have no real desire to 'follow' or 'keep in touch' with the scene. I feel like I have 'done that' at the correct times both in student-hood and adulthood.

Sorry, I realise that this blog is very self-centred (obviously). I hope that you realise that I find it quite theraputic just being able to 'voice'  thoughts down 'on paper'. I don't know who (if anyone) bothers to read this, but hey.

IT WORKS! IT WORKS! MWAHAHAHAAHAAAA!

Oh the joy of having a 'print' option is beautiful. Ok Ok Ok, for me, years without having a computer, let alone a printer, was difficult, but now, touch wood (I do literally), I can print. I realise that much of my 'design education' has involved a workpiece / end product, and a printer can obviously provide this. Not to a final presentation quality, but at different stages of a 'design process', it will have its uses.

OK, I realise it may be of no interest to many, and I may seem incredibly boring, but I am just presenting my joy.

I have just typed this at a 'break-neck' speed, and I realise that the coffee slipped down very well earlier.
hmmmmm

v1 (Dec 2010)

To tell the truth, I am writing this to test out my new printer. I have been just over two months now in my ’independent living’ stage of my rehabilitation.

It has been over 4 years since my life-altering accident. Yes, that’s right, FOUR YEARS! A world-cup apart.

Rehabilitation is not a destination, it is a life-long journey. This is very true. It hurts not to have a target, but instead a lifestyle. Hard to accept it, but slowly I’m having to. Although psychologically difficult, I haven’t yet been broken by any physical effort. This may be strange as I am in a wheelchair. However, I know that I am restrained to it, and know my physical limitations (or atleast, think I do). The positive ability I have is my mental ability to do what I am doing and assessing things as i uncover tasks.

I think that I have always had a strong mentality. Proof of it comes from many places including my work, study, and education. I admit that it may be viewed as stubborness, which, if turned correctly into determination, leads to self-belief, and ultimately, success. 

Now, combine this ability with patience (which i do strive for) and my physical low weight lends itself to being ‘a climber’ when it came to cycling - a love of my life. My patience and my confidence in my own company. are not only skills that I would feel comfortable drawing on whilst cycling up a long climb, but also have been forced to draw upon since my accident (from lieing ‘alone’ in a hospital bed, to living alone today).

For myself, I often feel myself being upon a long, big, endless, climb. Every pedal stroke is like it’s equivalant to a new day. It is a long, long, climb. Only when I reflect, do I see how far I have travelled.

I look up, always trying, but I can’t really spot or specify and end to the road I am on. Do I want an end? Of course I do, but I will (or plan to) continue to get higher and higher. My main target is to keep my pace up, dropping all opposition or tackling obstacles with ease.

ok.page finished time to try printer....